2011 Reflection

Wow! I have really been busy these last two months and I had better get one last blog in before 2011 ends!

I've been reflecting about this year, 2011. What a year it has been! I am all about relationships and this year has been amazing for them for me! My profession as a teacher has always limited the scope of relationship-building and was very hard to continue relationships past the school year, with one or two exceptions. But relationships that I have formed while on Council tend to last. 2011 has really introduced me to people that I never would have met and it is so exciting! Just when people my age are beginning to wind their careers down, I am looking forward to the future and the promise of newness. What is lying ahead? I could never have predicted the outcomes of this year!

Not only have I made new friendships, but many from before have grown. Situations change and with those changes come new perspectives. When friends count on each other and have a trusting shoulder to lean on, the connection is stronger. I feel so fortunate to have those connections. As changes happen, I hope that I will accept change and move forward. Sometimes that's hard for me, but I won't digress....

This blog is about the relationship-building of 2011. I learn something or glean something from everyone I meet. It is the human psyche phenomenon where the chemistry between people causes that chemical reaction we call friendship. I cannot live without it. When it is mutually valued then everything should be done to keep it alive. In this day and age of technology, when physical presence isn't always possible, then a tweet, facebook message, or text can often keep friends in touch. Many times, just a simple text or tweet has put a smile on my face. Those can tide the connection over until the face-to-face happens.

2012 will be a year of continuing to cultivate relationships! Who wants lunch?!!!

Not once, but twice...

In the priest's message yesterday I heard two things. Usually, the message isn't that riveting, but yesterday's spoke about friends in a way that made me take notice. The first was when he said that we don't know why, but some friends just by being there and listening make a difference. Just by their willingness to listen unconditionally, our hearts are lightened. That phenomenon always puzzled me. How is it that just someone's presence without even speaking makes a difference? Human emotions have so many mysteries... But to have those connections in your life is something to treasure because they are rare.

Second, sometimes we have that one person who sees something in us that we don't see in ourselves. With their encouragement we pursue something that we might not have otherwise. This is exactly what happened with me. Teaching has always been my passion because it came naturally to me. I love it! Being encouraged to go into politics was new. Never thought about it until someone suggested it and encouraged me. As it turns out, they were right! Their encouragement and friendship to this day has been something that I have cherished. So I am extremely grateful for that friend.

All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.
- Havelock Ellis

Nothing Like Friends!

It's close to birthday time, and as I was walking today, I was thinking of what an awesome year this has been! I've met challenges and feel stronger for them now. Some are still on my plate and new ones are on the horizon. But most of all, my relationships with my friends has been strengthened. Meeting new people who have instantly become friends, growing the bonds with already friends, and deepening bonds with the closest friends has made me grateful for each and every one!

As the picture illustrates, sometimes there's that one friend (or two) who stands out in a sea of friends. Being that friend is an awesome responsibility. It takes a special relationship to build that bond. It's one of trust and time. It doesn't happen overnight. It's cultivated. It takes two to make that happen. But as time goes by and it gets tested and survives, then you know that you have something special with that person.

Here's to all of my friends, and to those out there who will be! Cheers!

Serendipity X 2

Over the last week, I have had experiences that have just come out of the blue and been soooo cool! I call them my Serendipity moments. It's when life happens when you least expect it and it has an impact on you! The first really awesome one happened last Saturday at the Summer Youth Development Program ceremony. I saw a name on the poster board assignment that one of the students had made. I knew that it could only be the daughter of my third grade student. And it was! My student was even there! I had reconnected with her a few years ago after 25 or so years. Life had not always been kind to her, but she is on the right path now. Two of her children had completed the program successfully and it was wonderful to see the impact that program had on their family.

Tonight I had another blast from the past! Through my Lincoln Series organization I met a woman from Alton. My mother was born and grew up there. I was trying to find out if she may know any of my cousins, but I have lost contact with them and didn't have married names. So we struck out in that regard. But I did remember that name of the street where my grandmother lived. It was only about eight houses long and was on a hill. (Almost everywhere in Alton is on a hill!) Well, her aunt and uncle live on that street and have for years! They probably knew my grandma! I was so excited to talk with her about the house and that street. My grandma died in '69, so it has been awhile since I visited there.

The house was very poor. When I was little it had a dirt floor in the lower floor, so they could bring in the coal. The bathroom only had a toilet and a shower head, so you could sit and take a shower at the same time. There was only one real bedroom and the kitchen was on the lower floor too. But my mom's family grew up there, all five kids and Grandma. It was so different from our own house, but I loved to visit. Grandma always made us feel like royalty and fixed chicken and noodles, which were the best!

Just meeting someone who knows that house made me feel an instant connection to her. It brought back all the wonderful memories of my childhood down at Grandma's house. Like the old cliche says, she may have been poor, but she was rich in love. I could feel it!

It was definitely "a small world" moment tonight!

Cheers!

I am a milestone kind of person, mainly because dates stick in my head from years ago through the present. Those are mostly birthdates of friends, relatives and even school children. Now more keep adding to the list! Other milestones of anniversary of events that have been important to me also stick in my head. Sometimes, I feel it is a curse to have all these dates in my brain because I don't think that others who share them remember them as I do. I usually don't say anything because I don't want them to feel bad that they don't remember like I do. Or they don't remember my birthday like I remember theirs. But I really don't mind that. It's the "It's more blessed to give than receive." aspect for me.

A five-year milestone happened for me this summer. It's been five years since I started my new adventure away from the full-time employment at CCNH. I loved working there and being with the children, residents, and other employees. But I feel that I am living the dream being on City Council and working for the whole City. The new relationships that I've formed and all the new people that I've had the privilege of meeting have given new meaning to me. The world of politics has been exciting and one that I have enjoyed enormously.

This new path that I've embarked on is one that knows no end. It has twists and turns that I never imagined. I'm grateful to those who join me, however long, and encourage, teach and support. It's all an adventure in life. I don't want to miss out!

Doing the Right Thing

On this Mother's Day I am reminded of how my mom would have been so proud of me. She missed so many milestones in our family with both grandchildren graduating from college and becoming successful adults. Her grandson's marriage and subsequent great-grandchildren would have been so happy for her. She is the one who always gave me encouragement and praise, especially growing up. Both of my parents and grandparents set the examples for doing the right thing, even when it is difficult. So as I reflect back, I have tried to follow their examples by doing what I feel is the right thing in whatever circumstance is before me.

The hard part of that is whose view is the right thing! I have my own views that I draw from many years of living. Then there are others who try to share their views and feel that theirs is the only right thing. I received an anonymous letter in the mail yesterday from someone who believes that I should only pay attention to their view of the election and not follow the new Mayor's initiatives. I have trouble with that. What if new ideas are good and help a City to progress? Where is keeping an open mind? Isn't part of being a leader listening to others' opinions and thoughts then acting as you feel is the right way? What if by working together we can move the City forward?

Sometimes doing the right thing is being unselfish. Sometimes that is easy and sometimes, not so easy. That's when I draw on the "How would I feel if someone did that for me?" Then it is easy to do the right thing. And many times, I have felt the unselfishness of others when I am the recipient of those good deeds. As moms that is what we do. As a teacher that is what I do. To know that others learn from those examples, it's gratifying.

At the end of the day, doing the right thing for me is the only thing that matters. It's like Rotary's Four-Way Test: Is it the truth? Is it beneficial to all concerned? Is fair to all concerned? And, will it build goodwill and friendships? It may not always jive with the other person's "right thing", but I cannot walk in their shoes.

Cheers to my mom who taught me to "Do the right thing!" And I have never regretted it!

Just me!

Politics is always interesting to me. Whether it be in a job or government, one has to be cognizant of the fact that not everybody thinks the same about your character. When I held my position at the county nursing home, I always upheld the highest standards and did my best to respect the other employees, residents, children, and their families. But not everyone viewed it the same way! Through the four years that it took me to receive my Masters' degree in Guidance and Counseling, I became accepting of that fact instead of continually beating myself up for what I should or could have done differently trying to please everyone. During the closing process of the daycare center, I made a speech at the County Board saying that it was ok to close our center for the good of the whole county. We had a great almost 16-year run and there were no regrets. That was five years ago this month. Recently, I had a person comment to me how he remembered that speech even now. I was surprised because it was just me.

The political campaigning is in full bloom right now. When everybody surrounding campaigns is being put under the microscope for their actions or inactions, it is more important than ever to be aware. For me, it's not hard. I have always wanted to take the high road and treat others just as I would like to be treated. I see no point in spreading rumors that aren't true. I try to look at the positive characteristics in people and make my associations accordingly. Does that mean that I don't talk or meet with others who I may disagree with? No, that would be very narrow-minded of me. I feel that you can always learn something by talking to others. Does that mean that people should jump to conclusions about my beliefs or convictions or loyalties? No. It's just me wanting to know others better. By knowing people, we can remove the barriers to communication that can sometimes exist.

I will say that when others may attempt to cast negative aspersions against me, I will not be a hypocrite and support their actions. I will stand up for myself and decide which direction to take that will show my conscience. If people notice that, I'm glad. It's just me.

I am far from perfect and have made many mistakes, but through it all I hope that my positive contributions will outnumber the negative!

It's just me!

Politics in Motion!

City Girl is long overdue! So much has been happening in my "City" that I've been neglecting my blogging. I will confess that politics took most of my time in January. But I love them! Watching the process play out is the best. Meeting with people and talking with people is what life's about. Everyone has opinions and wants to share them. Everyone thinks that their opinions are the "right" ones. It takes much listening and contemplation to decide which match my own. By listening and opening my mind to new possibilities, sometimes I change my mind. Usually, that change feels much better.

Many, many issues are before me now that have consumed so much time. Since they impact the whole City, I have to get it right in my mind. The decisions that are facing the City cannot be made lightly, nor quickly. I hope by talking to as many people as possible and getting all the facts that I need, I will make the tough decisions without second thoughts. Having so many people who trust me to do that makes getting it right important. I know that not everyone will be happy. But I hope that they will know that I will have thoroughly vetted every possibility. I cannot thank enough those around me who give their advice and encouragement freely and with the best intentions. I appreciate it. It makes me able to move forward.

The State of Illinois' Inauguration was a highlight in my month! I had never participated before and what fun! Of course, knowing two of the elected officials personally made the events most meaningful. Attending the parties and events with good friends and my brother added to all the fun! The Capitol Building is the hub of our politics and still has me in awe of its splendor.

Democracy is for the people and by the people and I am proud to have a small part in that process! I would be remiss if I didn't acknowledge the 100th Birthday of one of our finest presidents, Ronald Reagan. Visiting his Presidential Library was awesome and standing by the piece of the Berlin Wall that had been torn down (picture, '05) reminded me of how powerful Democracy is for all!